Where do feelings come from? This is a very important question to ask yourself because if you knew where your feeling of low self confidence is coming from, you’ll be able to address it and fix it!

Do feelings appear from the mind? Are they born of what people say to us? Are they a result of our past? Our upbringing? Are feelings there because they appear in the night in our dreams? Where do you think feelings come from? Particularly, where does your feeling low self confidence come from?

Feelings are not the start of our emotions. Thoughts are. We have a thought, we dwell on it, we allow ourself to believe it, then we start ‘feeling’ it. Your feelings of low confidence did not appear in your life and mind overnight. It crept in there from a little thought that seeded, then grew, then matured in your mind. 


Yes, your feelings come from your thoughts. Change your thoughts and you can change your feelings!

Now that you know this, what are you going to do about it? Here are some points to help you change your thoughts  in order to change your feelings. 

How to change your feelings


1. Change your feelings by challenging your thoughts

Now you know that your feelings of low self-confidence are directly affected to how you think, you have to challenge these thoughts when they pop into your mind. It would be easy for me to tell you to just stop thinking those thoughts, but if you’ve been doing them for years this would be almost impossible to  do. Start this process by challenging the thoughts when they pop into your mind.

For example, when you think ‘ I can’t do this because I don’t have the skill’, challenge this thought by thinking of similar things you’ve done successfully before, or with your other strengths – things you can do just as well, if not better than other people.

Challenging your negative thoughts will break them down bit by bit – in the same way you built them up bit by bit.

2. Change your feelings by finding solutions to negative thoughts

When the thought pops up in your head which will give vent to your low self confidence feelings, find it a solution. For instance if you think your interview won’t go well because you don’t have a brilliant interview track record, find solutions with which to feed your mind. Search for interview advice on the Internet. Have a practise run with your peers and film it so that you can see your physical reactions and what you can change. Get yourself a new outfit so you’ll look your best. Do your research about the job and prepare yourself well.

When you’ve done this, feed your mind with all positive information each time you find yourself thinking you won’t have a good interview. For each problem, have a positive answer and retrain yourself to be problem solving. As we said, you probably won’t be able to get rid of your negative thoughts straight away. However, you can find solutions to stop your negativity veering out of control.

3. Change your feelings by training your thoughts

As we said before, thinking positively about your self-confidence may be difficult at this stage, but here’s a way you can start this process – as a filler until it becomes a natural thing for you to do. Here’s what will help. Find a quiet time of day. Some people find waking up 10 minutes earlier works best. Others prefer to do it in the evening. Close your eyes and think of all the things you’re good at and all the ways people have benefited from you and your talent in the past.

You may find yourself distracted at first, but you have to persist for this to work. You’re retraining your thoughts to dwell on your strengths rather than on your weaknesses. If this feels a bit strange at first, this is natural. Remember you’re asking your mind to do something you don’t normally do. It’ll take time to adjust.

Do this exercise each day for about 10 minutes at a time. You will plant the seed of positive self-confidence and it will grow from there and mature. This is providing it’s fed and watered daily by you. Don’t stop this when you’re feeling better. Make it a lifestyle so you’re not tempted to go back to your past way of thinking.

These three points should help you change your feelings because they help you change your thoughts. If you’ve enjoyed or benefited from ‘How To Change Your Feelings’ please share the word on your social networking sites or with someone who needs it today. Thank you.



43 Responses to “How To Change Your Feelings”

  1. Coupon Codes says:


    Thanks for changing great article about how to change your feelings. This is very useful information for online review readers. Keep it up such a great article like this.

    Sekhar Reddy.

  2. I think point 3 is the most psychologically valid point. I liked how you linked thoughts to feelings and the emotions. As such, planting the seed to a positive “feeling” through “thoughts”, seems to be a valid hypothesis.

    Points 1 and 2 are just as valid but in reality “finding solutions to negative thoughts” can be quite challenging. But on the other hand, focusing on the positive aspects of life is relatively easier!
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  3. Nice article – definately about changing your thoughts and building your confidence. If you are naturally positive it really helps. Many Thanks

  4. sarah says:

    this is a very good article and has some very good points about changing your thoughts and feelings. i will work on your tips to avoid all my terrible feelings. and these tips should go to everyone they seem life changing! excellent web page.

  5. Inspiring and right on the money as always Anne! I love your advice, and the only other thing I could think of that might help is journaling. I’ve worked with so many insecure first-time entrepreneurs and one of the first things I do is gift them with a “success” journal where they can write down daily accomplishments. Nothing is too small. Most people balk at first, but if they can muster the discipline to keep it up for even a week, it’s life altering!
    Marquita Herald recently posted..You Suddenly Realize You’ve Outgrown Your Life … Now What?!My Profile

    • Anne says:

      That’s an excellent addition to the article, Marty. Thanks for suggesting it. Writing things down helps in many ways. I find it particularly useful for checking myself, what did I say, what was the plan, what exactly did I hope to achieve.
      I only started doing that this year because in previous years I’d make plans, then forget what they were precisely. Writing them down gives me a reference point.
      Anne recently posted..Affordable Weekend DIY ProjectsMy Profile

  6. After reading some nice stuff in your article I really feel speechless, because it is quit pretty article. Beside this it is also a long lasting article. Thanks for giving me such type of useful information..

  7. Chu Nam says:

    Another way change feeling, just take action, do something that you love to do, simple moving our body can change our feeling. Ask ourselves what I want to do or love? Such as listen music.. that will help increase our energy and change feel. With high energy and good feel we can do many things else.

  8. its my opinion human tendency is what he want to listen and what he want to feel will do so ..for example if the tendency is being happy u will cherish any moment and if the tendency is sad you can spoil a happy moment..So as you said all beneath in you just shift your thoughts towards positive direction and feel the changes

  9. devdas says:

    Very good article about about how to change feeling…definitely its going to help each individual. Keep up the good work. Very much inspired Article.

  10. “Change your feelings by challenging your thoughts” This point is to true…we always give in to our thoughts then we end up being so frustrated. Thanks a lot for sharing this article.

  11. Amanda Adams says:

    Many of us have become prisoners to our own thoughts. You have clearly outlined what we can do to salvage ourselves from this prison. The article is quite inspiring.


  12. Hiten says:

    Hi Anne,

    This was an excellent post on how we can change the way we feel.

    One point in your post really stood out for me. It was what you said about surrounding ourselves with all the ‘solutions’ there are to the unhelpful thoughts we are having. I think this is brilliant advice.

    I also appreciated the point about not getting complacent. If we have found the way we are feeling is getting better, then we need to continue with the positive activities we are doing.

    Thank you.
    Hiten recently posted..Leadership Qualities and How to Develop ThemMy Profile

    • Anne says:

      Thanks for your wonderful addition to the post, Hiten. That’s right, sticking with what works is key to getting better. Some people try solutions and quit far too early. Many times the things we think won’t work may have done, had we stuck with them a little longer.

  13. Hi Anne,

    he he…guess we were on the same wave length this week with our blog posts. I love this one because you get to the point about feelings. Plus the best part is that you give solutions that work!

    I love all 3! Changing your thought process does have a great impact on changing your feelings. I urge any of your readers to practice this.

    Donna Merrill recently posted..11 Limiting BeliefsMy Profile

    • Anne says:

      Thank you for the vote of confidence, Donna. It’s always a pleasure to have you over here. And yes, when I read your post I thought so too. We were definitely thinking the same thing 🙂

  14. prasant says:

    Great article to build up the confidence through the change in feelings. But its easier said than done. Its very hard to control your feelings and I am trying for the same in my life. You did a beautiful job through this post Anne.
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  15. Great advice as always Anne. I follow each of your suggestions, but I also find that giving myself the gift of ‘quiet’ time to center myself makes a huge difference. When I was much younger I had a flash temper that no doubt grew out of being bullied as a kid. It took me awhile to teach myself to stop before I opened mouth and inserted foot 🙂
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    • Anne says:

      Definitely, Marty. Quiet time is important when healing and building our selves up. 10 minutes may seem like a long time to give, but as I said in the article, it’s a good investment for a better, more confident future.

      Thanks for your input, Marty. I appreciate it.

  16. Jess from Linden says:

    Hi Anne, definitely great advice. For me, when I start to notice I’m having negative feelings like you mentioned, I will immediately try and focus on instead being grateful for everything around me. The sunshine, running water, ability to see, ability to walk, etc. I then try to focus on how I can make someone else’s day better or look for ways to help others out. This is something that I just started to do recently and it has had a huge positive effect. Thanks for posting!
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  17. Shane Vargas says:

    What a nice post, the source of our feelings is such a deep basket. Its sort of like where do our dreams come from? Anyway good thought provoking post that will have people doing some self examination.
    Shane Vargas recently posted..Metodo GabrielMy Profile

  18. Utkarsh Bhatt says:

    I am a quite person. I never get the courage to talk to people in person. just this day, I found this blog and this has changed my mind completely. You are quite inspiring. Now I am going to change my thoughts for the sake of myself. I’ll try to follow. Thank you!

  19. RapidRoaR says:

    Sometimes, It’s very hard to Change our focus and Drive our Feelings to other way. Excitement are many time Dancing and controlling our minds.
    But, Nice Article.
    Thanks Enjoyed a Lot.
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  20. lightrelief says:

    Sometimes you need more sunshine to boast your mood. Exposion to full spectrum light can make you feel better. In fact, even people with no history of SAD conditions report feeling more energized and generally more positive by introducing light therapy into their daily lives.

  21. Liping says:

    Thanks for the article! Definitely has me thinking of different ways to build confidence!

  22. Faiz Alam says:

    this is awesome post that i find today, i am eager to change my self, this post will help me a lot…Thanks Anne!!

  23. Tulisaa says:

    This is really valuable information. It can be hard to change your feelings but by finding alternatives to negative thoughts is a good way. And also trying to stay away from negative people as this can have a detrimental effect.
    Tulisaa recently posted..How To Keep A Guy InterestedMy Profile

  24. Gm shovo says:

    Great tips for changing feelings. No doubt this post will help any one to change his mind. But actually its really hard to change your mind immediately.

  25. moneymaker says:

    this is a very good article and has some very good points about changing your thoughts and feelings. i will work on your tips to avoid all my terrible feelings. and these tips should go to everyone they seem life changing! excellent web page.
    moneymaker recently posted..HIPPO QUOTES INSURANCEMy Profile

  26. Chim from One says:

    Very insightful post. It often feels as if the feelings have a mind of their own and control the thoughts. But you’re right-it’s the other way round. Challenging your thoughts is really a constant battle and it can be difficult when you’re not by yourself. But it is crucial in dealing with negative emotions.

  27. idev says:

    Very Positive article, feeling comes from our thought, our environment ,family, friends, and work group. for the good feeling family and work group is most responsible because most of the we passed with them. so we should try to create positive and good things among them.

  28. It’s amazing that there are ways to change your feelings like this. I never knew there were ways to change it. This def opens eyes and allows a new way of looking at feelings. Thanks for sharing!

  29. prohowbook says:

    Awesome article! I`m feeling high to the sky and really boosted my confidence to the next level. I`m gonna show em all who they r messing with 🙂 Thanks once again

  30. Nice article. Lots of people dont know that it is all a function of the mindset. Many people are too inflexible with their thoughts.

  31. Marry says:

    Thank you for sharing a new way to change you life get rid of tensions and live a healthy life. Superb Article!

  32. DRSNOOZE says:

    Usually I do not learn from posts on blogs, but I would like to say that this write-up very compelled me to check out and do so. To be honest, I’m so happy reading this article. Actually, I’m a loner person. I need this kind of positive insightful article to gain some confidence to face my fears. Thank you for producing a good and very informative website.

  33. Ali kholi says:


    Thanks for charing this great article about changing poeples feeling , It’s really not easy but we can do it if only we get these negative thoughts out of our heads .

    Ali kholi recently posted..مجموعة مواقع Freelancer للعمل الحر و الربح عبر الانترنتMy Profile

  34. jacsonjohn says:

    Hi Anne this one really amazing blog post feeling is day by day change I agree with article and approaches to modify your own inner thoughts similar to this. My partner and i never knew there were approaches to change it out. thanks for the post

  35. Hi Anne,

    You have shared a wonderful CONFIDENCE Booster exercise!

    Oftentimes, our confidence is covered with fear and worries. If we have something to hold on, we command our mind not to be over-powered by negative thoughts so that we can discover our life purpose… happiness and enthusiasm.

    Thanks for this great article Anne!
    Patricia Anderson recently posted..Finding Your Dream Job: Diane’s StoryMy Profile

  36. I think the most efficient way to change feelings is to go to outside the home, and watching trees and nature, I am writing this because it always work for me.
    Neeraj Bansal recently posted..Android vs iOS history, market share, features, comparisonMy Profile

  37. Mollik Pal says:

    Hy, Anne Fist I’d like to thank you for your nice post. Itss really hard for me to change my feelings. But After reading your great post, I know everything about changing feeling.

    Take my thanks from a Indian supporter Mollik Pal/Mollik Gosh

  38. […] you have that you of yourself that you would like to change. Then replace those negative beliefs with new, positive beliefs. The only thing that’s true is what you belief to be true. As a man thinketh in his heart, so […]

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