We looked at this article where we discussed, How to Build Confidence to Delegate. We examined the three main reasons people can’t delegate and came up with some revealing issues about personalities which were frankly depressing. This is not the end of the story though. We all know that the first part to rectifying a problem is accepting that it exists. Now that we’ve identified these areas that need work, let’s look at the three ways we can build confidence to delegate.

Please note: it would be better to read part one of this article before continuing with this one. 

How to build confidence to delegate: 2


having the confidence to delegate frees you to enjoy beauties of life

1. Build confidence to delegate by recognising your compulsion

If you fall into the first category, (obsessive compulsive) you’ll need to first of all recognise that you’re obsessed. It’s not okay to just dismiss it as liking things ‘your way’. Identify why your way is better than all the other ways out there. Identify why your process of getting the job done is the best or only process there is. I’m sure you can’t honestly find a suitable answer. Once you’ve recognised your compulsion or obsession, decide to let it go in thirds. You don’t have to go completely cold turkey. For example, if you won’t let others file away the folders because they won’t do it your way, here’s how to get around this. Learn how someone else is doing it and do a third of your filing their way. You’ll still allow yourself an obsession, as you can follow their way precisely, then yours precisely. Once you’ve done this for a while you’ll see that their way is not that bad after all. Now you’re ready to go half and half. At this time, you’ll have enough confidence to let someone else take over – at least half the time. You would’ve broken the obsession – at least partly – because you can now understand that others have a good system of doing things too. You may even like theirs, after giving yourself the reason to try it.

2. Build confidence to delegate by addressing the real issues stripping you of your power

If you fall into the second category (feeling powerless) you need desperately to look at the issues stripping you of your power of self. Dig deep to build your confidence. Have a look at our confidence-building activities and confidence building aides page. Get professional counselling if possible. Your way may be right – it probably is. But so are the ways of others. You may say you can’t trust others, so you covet information and hold secrets. This is just a way of making yourself feel powerful.

There are untrustworthy people in the world, and we’d do well to keep them at arm’s reach. However, a large number of people you ‘can’t trust to get the job done’ are honest, hard-working people, just seeking to find their place in the world. Your mistrust has nothing to do with them. This is solely and absolutely your issues – not theirs. Identify this and make an effort to hand over some of your ‘power’. You can only build up the confidence to do this if you actually start doing it. There’s no way around it. You will find that the more you allow others to do, the more confident you become in your delegating skills. You may even like not having all that work to do 🙂

Brave people aren’t those who do not possess fear. Brave people are those who take the plunge in spite of, and in the presence of fear. You can only become confident to delegate if you are doing so in spite of your fear of handing over the skills, information, knowledge etc you think makes you powerful. These things do not make you powerful. Your sense of what is valuable has become warped along the years. The thing that makes you powerful is your ability to let others in and allow others to learn even when you’re feeling inadequate. This is true strength of character. Try it and you’ll see.

3. Build confidence to delegate by improving your leadership skills

This is one that you may not be able to do on your own unless you’re really determined to see it through. We discussed, in the category of those not being natural leaders, that delegation does not come easily to those who can’t teach. By this I don’t mean that you can’t stand up in front of a classroom. All of us have strengths and weaknesses. The way to advance in life is obviously to play up your strengths. However, there are brilliant people who do amazing work for their communities, who can’t lead a group of people. It’s just a fact of life we have to accept.

If your strengths lie elsewhere, you may not be able to delegate, simply because you’re not a natural leader. You prefer (and find it easier) to just do everything yourself. If this is you, then taking a course on delegation will be the right thing for you. Here’s an amazing book on the powers of effective delegation. I definitely recommend it. If your leadership skills aren’t great you may even want to take a parenting course to top up what you already know about raising your kids. A very important part of nurturing kids and getting them ready to face the world without us is being able to delegate – let them burn the rice, allow them to ‘pink’ the whites in the wash, be willing to let them do the shopping now and then. (Obviously, I’m not talking about allowing our kids to step into danger’s way).

So, what are your thoughts on building confidence to delegate? Have you had to struggle with this aspect of your confidence-building? What other advice would you give someone battling with delegation issues? If you liked ‘How To Build Confidence to Delegate 2‘, please share it on your favourite social networking sites. Thank you.

4 Responses to “How To Build Confidence To Delegate: 2”

  1. selma says:

    Nice post, I think for self confidence the better thing is speak clear and direct with all people , looking their eyes, lossing our shame

  2. farouk says:

    i can relate to this Ann , i have a business and i am always the one who does everything, i just don’t feel good when i delegate tasks to people

    • Anne says:

      It comes with practice, Farouk. You just have to allow yourself to trust people. Sometimes the extent to what people can do will pleasantly surprise you, especially if they know you’re depending on them.
      Anne recently posted..Feng Shui TipsMy Profile

  3. Building confidence says:

    great article! thank you!

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